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Week in Review: The Confessions Edition

Confession: I pretty much always eat breakfast first thing when I wake up, even when I’m not that hungry.

Confession: I’m usually hungry about an hour after I eat breakfast, even if I wasn’t that hungry when I ate my breakfast.

Confession: I’m really bad about taking my camera places, like to a reading I attended on Thursday night by Pulitzer-prize winning poet Gregory Pardlo. I took it to the potluck held by the creative writing program beforehand, but I forgot to take any pictures, and then at the reading itself, I left in it in the car. Oh, well. He was amazing. Highly recommend for poetry or creative nonfiction.

Although I did get a picture of the salad I made. That is one habit food blogging has put me into. Take pictures of food.

Confession: I usually lesson plan the morning before I teach.

Confession: I have an imaginary playlist for spin class, and when I play my favorite songs when I’m driving around town, I imagine myself spinning to them.

Confession: I’ve been making it a point to write every evening, but sometimes I don’t so much write as rant.

Confession: I procrastinate from doing my homework by looking at the Lands’ End catalogue that came in the mail. So many sweaters!

Confession: I also procrastinate by trying new recipes.

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Kabocha Squash Lentil Enchiladas: new to the blog this week!

Confession: I eat a lot of sugar.

Confession: Sometimes when I get really hungry, I start crying because I feel like I’ve already eaten too much.

Confession: Fall is my favorite season.dscn2152

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Fall leaves, chicken noodle soup

Confession: I cleaned the living room this week, and I keep the kitchen and dining room decent, but my room is like a tornado came through.

Halloween Joke: What’s the only room in the house that ghosts can’t enter?

The living room.

Confession: I don’t air up the tires on my bike as often as I should.

Confession: Even though this blog is about eating disorder recovery, and I act like I’m all recovered and know what I’m doing, I still have really low moments. On Friday I had a moment of absolute panic during spin class–I won’t go into too much detail because I don’t want to be too triggering for readers. Fortunately, I talked myself down from it.

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Looking out at the library and the beginning of the sunset after spin class on Friday night.

Confession: When I have a lot of homework to do (this week, grading, a draft for my thesis, and a translation of three poems from English into German), I often spend the whole day on my couch. Ew.

Confession: I’m so over the U.S. presidential election, but I haven’t done my research on any of the other candidates or issues on the ballot.

Confession: I tried to do my No-Shame November challenge and couldn’t because of extenuating circumstances on Wednesday. Just a reminder: are you thinking about yours?no-shame-novemberConfession: I backed out of a thesis reading that I was scheduled to give in November because A) that is way too early for anyone in my program and B) you have to put your foot down for your own mental health sometimes.

Confession: I almost only ever call my mom when I’m really upset and almost never when I’m doing okay. She must think I’m a basket case.

Confession: I’m almost always late to Wednesday night swing dance and Saturday afternoon swing practice.

Confession: Despite how many times my mother has taught me, I still cannot fold a fitted sheet.dscn2212-2Confession: I still haven’t put together my thesis committee or filled out the GS6 form that was due a month ago.

Confession: I really like Walk the Moon.

More sunset

More sunset

Thanks to Meg for my favorite link-up.

Your turn: one confession. Go!

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13 comments

  1. Cora says:

    1) Most things are better without worrying to take pictures – especially something like a poetry/nonfiction reading. Soak that stuff in. That being said, do you have a cell phone? With a camera? That could solve the camera issue…?
    2) Ranting is important. Very important. It doesn’t matter what ends up on the paper, as long as you write that sh*t down. Good for you.
    3) I’m seriously jealous of your ability to eat right away in the morning. Seriously. I wish.
    4) Ha. Living room…
    Hope you have a great week, Joyce. Accept these confessions as ‘life’ and remember to do something nice for yourself <3

    1. Joyce says:

      I do have a cell phone with the camera, although the quality of the photos is really crummy. It’s a good tip, though–thanks. I know in this day and age most people just do the phone thing, but I just lumber around with my little monster of a camera. πŸ™‚
      Ha! Sometimes I wish I had the ability to actually wait before I eat in the morning, but it’s a habit I’ve been in pretty much my whole life. I don’t think it’s a big deal either way.

  2. Hey, ALL of us in recovery still have low moments. And that’s 100% okay! We are always here for you, too. πŸ™‚

    Confession: I gave myself two hours to work on my senior thesis yesterday and only ended up working on it for half an hour. The Internet is a distracting place!

    1. Joyce says:

      Oops. Not judging, but yes–the struggle is real. πŸ™‚

  3. Evangeline says:

    I always eat first thing when I wake up. Some mornings, it’s the only thing that gets me out of bed. Procrastibaking is a thing. I’m sure. Sending lots of love your way for those frustrating low moments <3

    Confession: I'm turning 17 on Saturday, and I'm really scared for all the change that's happening this year. I don't feel ready.

    1. Joyce says:

      That’s so exciting–happy birthday! Change is scary, I hear you, but it’s so important too.

  4. Confession: I can’t fold a fitted sheet either.

    Fall is the Hubby’s favorite season too although right now it feels like summer…I’m not complaining, I love it.

    I don’t know much about ED’s so I’ll simply say keep your head up and keep pushing yourself…the more you do things, the easier they will become. I promise.

    Happy Monday and thanks for linking up.

    1. Joyce says:

      It feels like summer here too, although I think it’s going to get cooler later in the week.

  5. Honestly? Your confessions just made you even more relatable and sympathetic to me. If I actually commented on every one of them I nodded to/immediately thought I’d comment on this would become a short novel of a comment. So I’ll try to keep it short though I don’t like missing some points.
    1. Kudos for planning a lesson just the morning of giving it. I’m not sure I’d be able to pull that off and this is a genuine compliment.
    2. Ranting is good for the soul. Letting things bottle up or forcing yourself to write about something else would be going against your intuition. Never a smart idea.
    3.Kitchen = cleaner than my bedroom. No details to be revailed here ;).
    4. We all struggle more than we talk about. I certainly do If you ever need to talk to anybody – about anything – you know I’m just an email away. No pressure about a reply right now as I see how busy you are. Take care of yourself!

    1. Joyce says:

      It helps that I’ve already taught this course two semesters. πŸ™‚ But thank you! I’m sorry I haven’t responded to your email, but I will. No judgment on the messy bedroom. πŸ˜‰

  6. Quill says:

    My confession is that at this moment I’m a full week ahead on homework – things due Friday are already done, I’ve looked a little bit at stuff for the following week. To many this would sound like something to be glad or proud of, but the truth is it’s really just avoidance of harder things. I’ve been undergoing some emotional challenges, as my girlfriend recently decided that a relationship might not be right for her, putting us as just friends, hopefully rather close friends. This might be for the better in the end, especially for her, but it’s a difficult thing for me to handle, I really need to process it, reflect upon my thoughts, write in my journal, deal with it. I’ve mostly just been shutting it out of my mind in the name of being “productive,” until I completely run out of “productive” things to do, but I know this isn’t what I really need to be doing to care for myself.

    1. Joyce says:

      I remember you told me about that. I could be flippant and say that there are a lot worse ways to cope than by doing homework (which is true; teaching freshmen I see all kinds of interesting “coping” methods), but I know that’s not that helpful. Hang in there!

  7. I have to eat right when i wake up too! Im starving almost instantly.
    I put my phone on do not disturb 95% of the time, because hearing it vibrate gives me anxiety!

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